


know what it is to grow

by gee (falloutblink182)



Category: Captain America (Movies), Captain America - All Media Types
Genre: Domestic Fluff, Gardens & Gardening, M/M, That is all, because gay rights etc etc, bucky takes up gardening, but he is cute about everything he does, he also has two very nice handsome boyfriends, he is very cute about it, i just love bucky barnes a lot guys and i want him to be happy, i want him to do nice things that make him happy :(((((((, just pure fluff guys
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-10
Updated: 2019-06-24
Packaged: 2020-04-24 07:37:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,433
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19168738
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/falloutblink182/pseuds/gee
Summary: in which the winter soldier has a green thumb.title from 'run' by hozier.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> the tenses are probably all over the place. i'll ask you to just roll with it. 
> 
> also i have no idea if alan titchmarsh and monty don are as famous outside of the uk as they are here, but if you don't know who they are: they're famous gardeners. that's it.

Steve didn’t know exactly when or why Bucky had decided that he was the next Alan Titchmarsh – one day Bucky had been complaining about the quality of the green beans from the grocery store and Sam had offhandedly mentioned that if they were _really_ that bad then he could always grow his own, and then all of a sudden the garden that had always remained mostly neglected was full of vegetables, fruit, flowers and plants, with little labels saying which plant was which. A vibrant red watering can that had a flower shaped spout sat on the patio table, and Steve thought that Bucky must have gone out and bought it himself because he can’t remember ever seeing it in the small wonky shed the few times he had actually gone in there for whatever reason.

Currently, Bucky was kneeling over an empty patch of soil and planting some fiery marigolds that he had bought from the market that morning. He was wearing a straw hat that had seen better days, and his hair was tied in a low bun at the nape of his neck. A few strands fell loose, framing his face. Steve swayed on his feet a bit – every now and again, he catches sight of Bucky and feels overwhelmed at how lucky he is, to have him here, alive, and humming Top 40 hits as he plants flowers.

“Coming through!” the sound of Sam’s voice shakes Steve out of his thoughts and he steps out of the doorway where he was ~~stalking~~ watching Bucky so that Sam can get past with a tray of lemonade that he puts on the patio table, next to the bright red watering can.

“Hey Monty Don, come get a drink before you pass out from heatstroke,” Sam called over to Bucky, frowning when he was ignored.

“He has his Air Phones in,” Steve said, and Sam groaned.

“Man, I know _for a fact_ that you know they’re called AirPods, you asshole.”

Steve grinned.

Sam just rolled his eyes, and went over to tackle Bucky into the dirt, who in turn let out a very un-Winter Soldier-esque squeal and proceeded to pummel Sam’s face into the little compost pile. Steve, meanwhile, sat down on one of the patio chairs and took one of the glasses.

“Fighting is bad,” he says half-heartedly at Bucky, who pouts, but releases Sam and helps him to his feet. Sam grumbles a bit but is placated when Bucky brushes the dirt off of his lips and kisses him gently. Steve wrinkles his nose in disgust – that face had _literally_ just been buried in dirt. Gross.

The two of them wander over and Bucky picks up a glass but before he can take a sip it’s snatched from his hand and replaced with the other glass. He glares at Sam, who shrugs.

“This one has booze in it. Just because you two pensioners can’t get drunk doesn’t mean that I’m going sober on a day as nice as today,” he says, and he takes a huge sip to illustrate his point. Bucky glares at him with a look that could possibly kill a lesser man. Sam’s reaction, however, is to pull out another seat and kicks his feet up onto Steve’s lap.

Bucky glares harder, but when that has no effect, retaliates by sitting himself down on Steve’s lap – and, by extension, on Sam’s feet. Sam lets out a string of profanities, but Bucky looks smug. Steve just rolls his eyes and tries not to spill his drink as the other two argue. They eventually settle down, and the three of them sip their drinks and savour the peaceful quiet, which all of them know won’t last long.

At some point, Bucky had wrapped an arm around Steve and was leaning into his neck, running a hand through his hair and whispering things that made the hairs on Steve’s arms stand up straight. Sam took their empty glasses and put them to one side before wrapping his own arms around Bucky’s middle and suggesting that perhaps the three of them should go inside? After all, him and Bucky definitely need a shower after their tussle in the dirt, and showering together would save water, so the three of them disappear into the house, leaving behind the colourful garden full of life and three empty, sticky lemonade glasses.


	2. Chapter 2

Bucky scoops a handful of soil into his palm, and watches it as he lets it flow back through the gaps in his fingers. He takes a few deep breaths as he feels the dirt softly brush against his hand, and after some hesitance, he reaches out and gently runs his calloused fingertips over the soft flower petals in front of him. Sam and Steve would be home soon from their Avenger-related mission, meaning that they would soon find the arm that Bucky had torn from his body and thrown into the kitchen wall, leaving a sizeable dent in the plaster and ruining the paint. They’ll come home, they’ll see the mess, and they’ll freak out – this will lead to questions and fussing and more questions and more fussing but for now, Bucky’s mind is peaceful in the stillness of the garden, feeling the earth under his fingers and the gentle breeze weaving through his hair.

He doesn’t know how long he sits there in the grass, but at some point, he absently identifies the sound of a door slamming, the stomping and grumbling of two tired soldiers, the sound of them calling out his name. There’s a sudden silence, and Bucky thinks they must have found the mess. His theory is confirmed a moment later, when two bodies sit in the grass on either side of him, both men leaving a few inches of space between Bucky and themselves.

Both of them are tired, he can tell that much. They’re not wearing their Captain America outfits ( _“It’s not an outfit, Buck, it’s a_ uniform _,”) -_ Sam is wearing a hoodie that looks incredibly comfortable and Bucky is already hatching an elaborate plan to steal it before Steve does.

None of them talk for a while. They just sit, their breathing patterns beginning to mimic the sound of the wind whistling between the trees, and they watch as Bucky traces patterns into the soil with his fingertips and brushes them back over with the palm of his hand, over and over again. Surprising even himself, he is the first to speak:

“You gonna ask me what’s wrong or what?” his voice is low and hoarse. Sam and Steve exchange a look over his head.

“We thought you’d tell us yourself when you’re ready,” Steve says slowly, and Sam places a gentle hand on Bucky’s back. When Sam begins to move his hand in slow, steady circles, Bucky sighs, and his eyes flutter shut, his dark lashes resting softly on the purple bags that are finally, _finally,_ beginning to fade. Steve gently touches Bucky’s wrist, causing the man to still his hand, and gently the blond threads his fingers through Bucky’s. Steve begins to tenderly guide his thumb over Bucky’s bruised and scarred knuckles, and between him and Sam they slowly help ease the tension out from Bucky’s body.

They stay there for a while, breathing together. The only sounds are those of the birds chirping overhead and the rumble of the traffic out front. Bucky feels grounded in a way he rarely feels, even on his good days. The soil under his skin felt real, and now Steve’s hand in his feels real, the skin surprisingly soft.

This moment of serenity – it’s absurd to him, in some ways. One moment he’s tearing off his own arm, stuck in his head, moments away from Losing It with a capital L and a capital I, the next moment he’s in a garden of his creation, surrounded by plants that he nurtured and cared for and brought to life, whilst he himself is being cared for by two superheroes. Sometimes his mind plays tricks, and he thinks he’s still under HYDRA’s control, but right now he’s fairly certain that HYDRA wouldn’t have made him plant vegetables. He doesn’t think that horticulture is on the Grand Nazi To-Do List. This means, he decides, that he’s safe. In this garden, with colour and life and sweet scents, he is safe. 

With this realisation, he sighs. Sam and Steve look at him curiously, but Bucky just shakes his head, a small smile on his face. Bucky leads his boys back inside without a word, and he thinks he'll be alright. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i don't know how to write emotions so apologies if this is stilted in any way. also i should not have watched good omens before finishing this because the temptation (ha) to fill this with garden of eden metaphors was STRONG. i resisted though. ur welcome.


End file.
